Donuts done right!
Posted: December 30, 2012 Filed under: Child Centered Activities, In the Kitchen Leave a comment
Diffusing the Mad
Posted: November 3, 2012 Filed under: Art & Healing, Child Centered Activities, Permaculture & Home Renovation 5 CommentsWell, I anticipated a bumpy Fall for our daughter starting Pre K, preparing for the arrival of a baby brother and gearing up to move into a new home. What I did not anticipate was the utter grief and confusion she would experience with her father’s frequent absences. David has been doing a good bit of the rehab himself and this combined with a full time job and preparing for another baby is enough for any adult to manage and try to cope with. To a 3 1/2 year old child, it’s enough to tilt her axis. I confess I have been less than my idea of a good mother through many of the melt-downs, and last night’s was epic. I sent her to her room following some acting out and anger directed at me. I told her to come down when she felt able to make different choices. She went upstairs and screamed and sobbed for “daddy”. I felt helpless. Quite honestly I feel as big as a boat and as tired as any 42 year old might be in the 3rd trimester. I’ve been at the wall with how to navigate through all of this.
I got out some paper and oil pastels and started making marks…marks to describe how I felt. Later, my daughter quieted and we had some cuddling and talked about things that make her feel better when she’s upset. She listed off things like rocking in her chair, listening to stories, and I asked if she would like to see the picture I started, showing the strong feelings that I was having. Soon she was adding to the picture with bold, frenzied, strong-armed marks and telling me how MAD they were. She seemed to walk back through that energy but in a more contained way with the marks on paper. It was something. I witnessed, I watched and I was greatly reassured that we will all get through this. Not around it, not over or under, but through.
It’s 9 at night as I write this. David’s task tonight is sanding the new pine boards in the kitchen/dining room. Our girl just yelled out for him and again, he’s not here. I went in to try and comfort her and surprisingly she didn’t refuse me. She asked why daddy wasn’t home yet. I explained what he was doing again and it FINALLY occurred to me to get her one of his shirts to sniff and cuddle with while she went to sleep. A big smile, two thumbs up and now, 20 minutes later it is quiet.
Mid Summer Garden
Posted: July 28, 2012 Filed under: Farming off the Farm, Little Green Thumbs 3 CommentsThe garden is nicely producing with not too much work on our part at this point. We’ve harvested probably close to 8 maybe 9, gallon size bags of mixed greens, arugula and kale. We’ve had 2 rounds of radishes and expect to plant another group soon. The tomatoes are coming along well and the eggplants and cucumbers are starting to take off. So much abundance to be thankful for!!!!
Line & Shape
Posted: July 23, 2012 Filed under: Art & Healing, Child Centered Activities 3 CommentsAren’t all images made up of lines and shapes? Our 3 year old has been more and more engaged in mark making in the last few weeks. We’ve been talking about how everything can be broken down into lines and shapes. You can see how the ongoing dialog is helping her to organize her ideas. I notice a greater concentration and focus as well. So cool!! I post the images in the sequence in which they were created, over a several day period.
You’ve gotta love the “hair” in this one…
a tree-mendous fort
Posted: July 5, 2012 Filed under: Child Centered Activities 5 CommentsA couple years ago, at my day job, we built a tree fort. A furnituremaker helped, and the joinery made this something special; we cantilevered two platforms within an apple tree and it was quite beautiful, wrapped in blossoms during the spring flowering, hidden by leaves throughout the summer, ripe red fruit easily grabbed come autumn.
Something told me not to anchor the fort into the apple tree, and that premonition proved true a year later – last year – when we were told to move the fort to a different location. Down came the pieces (and the tree remains pristine) and the platforms were reassembled, this time surrounded by Austrian Pine trees. We added a crow’s nest, tucked high back among the pines.
But even that was not quite right. As children love a spot to hide in, we wanted to add a roof, and enclose the second level. Dimensioned lumber – your basic 4x4s or 2x4s – would not be right so off we went into the woods looking for beech and birch trees, to limb and cut down and use for the ridgepole, rafters and beams. We “beavered” the rafters and notched the cross beams. We used some pine boards for the walls and roof.
“Nice,” we were told, but “how about some old barn boards? And maybe some lobster rope to wrap some of the boards, and maybe a control panel, and maybe some driftwood, and…we need to trick this out.”
Given those marching orders, off we set looking for old barn wood. I put out a call to the network of Maine woodworkers, and found a woman whose husband dismantled a barn and has stored the wood in the loft of another barn on their farm. She wrote, “About 35 years ago, we tore down a barn in Auburn and put the wood in the loft of our barn. It has quite a few antique nails. I’d love to find a good home for this wood, but I don’t know if this is what [you’re] looking for. It is the siding of the barn, what was under the clapboard, and the wood is all different lengths much of it short. It is not “finished” in any way – may be too rough… but I’d be happy to have you take a look.”
Maybe not the wide beams used in fancy floors, but for a tree fort, with an ocean view…this may just be right. Soon I will be driving north in search of those special boards to add just the touch. In the meantime, the fort sure is a nice place from which to watch the lobster boats crossing the Saco Bay homeward with their day’s catch. As E said, as she tested out the fort, “Daddy, two thumbs up!”
“The Owl and the Pussy-cat” by Edward Lear
Posted: July 1, 2012 Filed under: Art & Healing, Child Centered Activities, Gallery - Quotes 2 CommentsRecently, while reading this to little E, she asked me, “Daddy, will you be the Turkey?” Why, yes, indeed, and this classic surely belongs in our summer’s reading list of love.
Community Children’s Garden
Posted: June 12, 2012 Filed under: Art & Healing, Child Centered Activities, Little Green Thumbs 3 Comments
Several community garden members and one Board member got together on Saturday to help plot out the Children’s Garden. We planted strawberries, pumpkins, lamb’s ear, mint, a lavender bush, tomatoes, a creeping onion and bean seeds. A small butterfly bush will soon be added. The lay out of the garden and walkway was designed to appeal to children’s senses and create easy interaction as they move throughout the space. Brushing the mint and lavender will release aromas, and the tomatoes, beans and strawberries on the outer edges will let children easily pick from the sides of the bed.
My daughter and I added painted rock critters this morning – two butterflies and one beetle. We will make several more soon.
Worry Doll Follow-Up
Posted: June 4, 2012 Filed under: Art & Healing, Child Centered Activities 3 CommentsHere are some of the worry dolls created by the elementary school children I worked with in May. Some of the children shared their worries during the art making process. Their ages were reflected in the types of worries they articulated. For example, the younger children talked more about characters from stories which caused them distress while some of the older children talked about getting into trouble at school and having to face their parents. One young girl in particular began group very disorganized and needed much 1:1 attention from me. Once she was able to focus on the doll making, she became lost in the process. She was able to work independently for short spells and seemed to calm down. Another child talked incessently about how she needed a “big doll for my big worries and a small doll for my small worries”. It seemed that she was creating order through the process of separating out her needs and devising a plan.
It was my honor to work with the students and I hope that the dolls continue to bring both joy and relief to their experiences.
Creative Coping and Following Their Lead
Posted: May 29, 2012 Filed under: Art & Healing, Child Centered Activities 4 CommentsA terrible day for our three year old over the weekend. She had talked her father into a ruby red, star-covered, helium balloon from the Memorial Day festivities. We watched many balloons soar into the sky, leaving behind sobbing little ones.
She had her ear-full of “don’t let go of it” and “watch out for …” while carrying it back to the car. Later in the day, her father took her for a bike ride. She wanted to bring the balloon so we tied it to the trailer. Sadly, the balloon untied on it’s own and drifted away shortly after they got to the playground. They came home and Ella was eager to tell me what had happened and how sad she was. She asked if we could make a picture to show what had happened (first time she’s ever asked).
I drew some cartoon boxes and had her tell me frame by frame how the terrible event unfolded. 
She described riding in the trailer, getting to the playground, meeting two girls and then watching the balloon float away. What is interesting about this is the time she then spent swirling glitter paint colors over the emotionally charged image of herself. This was the only box she gave special attention to and made her own marks on. I speculate that she was able to sit with the difficult feelings more easily through the character and the fluid property of the glitter paint allowed her to become lost in the process. She softened while working here, several times asking me to get the glitter out of her character’s eyes. She decided the glitter made the little girl feel better.
This three year old knew exactly what she needed to move through the painful experience. Our job was to listen to what she was asking for and to sit with her through the uncomfortable feelings.
